You are stronger than you think.
It takes way more effort to pull yourself out of a hole (and hold your proverbial ground) than it takes to hold ground never once riddled with holes.
I'm speaking to those of you who on some days it just hits you: how fucking exhausted you are of processing life's punches.
I get it. It's a fact -- some people do start off with (or continue with) a more peaceful life path, better confidence, or a more supportive life story.
It's normal to every so often, even after tons of self-cultivation, to feel frustrated and some days feel weak enough to break.
The thing is -- so many of us think that in order to move on we have to be strong.
I want to let you in on a little secret.
It's not about gaining strength.
If it was, you wouldn't be worrying about your current trying state of being that is happening where it feels like life is testing your strength.
Think about it...
One way physical strength is gained in the body is though the continuous pushing, tearing apart and rebuilding of muscular tissue. One way our immune system is built is through many little battles won over pathogens early on in our lives. Our minds grow stronger through intense studying and commitment or regular practice of meditation.
The maintenance of strength is about intervals, repetition, stamina and commitment.
If you commit to strength, you commit to being pushed over and over again.
Life isn't just about strength, it is also about ease.
If you are feeling weak in the midst of a life struggle it's time to realize -- you have been stepping up to a challenge. You have already become stronger by showing up and facing it.
The fact that you are feeling what you feel means that you are willing to face the story that you have been experiencing. or, the story that you continue to tell yourself.
You are already stronger than you think, but, in order to move forward and continue, what you truly need is confidence.
If you feel like you live a life is a constant uphill battle, yet, never feel like you can move ahead, I urge you to try this:
Stop asking for strength and start asking for confidence.
With confidence you gain tenacity, with tenacity you gain the next step, and with each step you gain actualization of yourself, your goals, your desires, and your ability to move forward.
We think that in order to move on that we must drag these anchors along with us -- they are the albatrosses around our necks.
This the frame of mind that we take on when we think we need more strength. However, if we want a life of ease and lightness we need to be willing to shift our perspective and allow a space for the lightness to set in.
We need to place our right to well being and freedom before our tragedies and struggles.
For so many years I kept asking for strength in the face of adversity, low self-esteem, depression, self-inflicted abusive relationships, or, extreme fatigue.
I would pray to Higher Power asking for more strength and not feel a change.
Of course I wasn't feeling any changes!
The more I asked for strength, the more I was given scenarios in which to grow stronger -- scenarios that pushed me, broke me down and pulled me apart so that I may rebuild a stronger character.
It wasn't until one night when it dawned on me...maybe instead of strength, I should ask for confidence.
So I did.
I asked for confidence...
I imagined those heavy anchors being cut and left behind...
I acknowledged that I was already strong enough...
And, what happened next was sort of unbelievable.
That image in my mind of the super weighed down and stagnant ship visually began to move forward. The heavy weight of emotions that I could not shake inside began to lift.
After several days of feeling terribly depressed, like magic, I woke up feeling empowered and happier than I had felt in weeks.
In reflection of the old saying, "be careful what you wish for", I decided to consciously shift my default of asking for "more strength"...and here's why...
If you ask for more strength, you'll be asked to "drop and give me fifty". You'll be asked to break down and build up. You'll be given heavier anchors to pull...until you are ready to ask for what you really need:
You need to give yourself permission to to cut anchor.
Life does not have to be unfair and full of punches. You are allowed to move forward with ease, confidence, grace, integrity of heart and trust in self.
I'm not saying that we shouldn't process our life stories. I'm not saying that we should simply rely on visualizations to free our hearts and minds.
Yes, sometimes, we fall back into a void of heavy feelings and wonder why life hasn't been easier, which is super valid.
However, if you are ready to let go, you must remember that you alone have access to cut those anchors and personal myths in order to move forward with ease and lightness.
We need to allow ourselves permission to have a shift in perspective. We need to constantly shift our thoughts (our prayers, wishes and mantras) from what we don't want (struggle) to what we do want (ease).
Words and thoughts are magic. They flavor our experience of the world and therefore our reality.
When we consciously change our perspective and wishes -- we consciously allow ourselves and the world around us the setting it needs to manifest lightness and an allowance to let go.
I want to encourage you when you you are feeling down to trust how life does not have to be about building strength becuase you are already enough.
Instead of asking for strength, try asking for confidence. Allow yourself to be, see and feel the beautiful, accomplished Soul that you are.
Allow yourself this shift of perspective and see what kind of manifestation occurs within and around you.
I believe in you.
You are already strong enough.
Now it is your turn to see it and believe it.
Big love and hugs your way,